Did I tell you I'm in a show?
It’s a type of musical comedy, we call it panto.
'What’s a panto?' I hear you say...
Oh let me explain, but it might take all day.
From a story or classic fairy tale it takes its plot,
but we shake things up quite a lot.
There's a bloke in makeup and outrageous frocks
and a girl playing a boy who loves sweaty socks.
There’s a baddie who’s mean and makes the audience hiss and boo,
Oh! and there’s a random panda too!
A lass plays the part of Aladdin who is our hero,
It’s a bit confusing, yeah I know!
There’s a genie, spirit and magical spells,
A FART with sound effects (but luckily no smells).
There's an emperor who is always pissed,
and a princess who yearns to be kissed.
There's singing and dancing, talented kids galore, and
the most amazing chorus and dancers you ever saw
There’s love and drama and terrible jokes,
and with cross-gender dressing it’s very woke.
The innuendo is off the scale,
with jokes about plums that never fail.
It’s a show with colour and sparkle and there’s lots of laughter,
and except for the baddie, everyone lives happily ever after.
There's also lots going on behind the scenes,
the stage crew is like a well-oiled machine.
The directors show us how to act,
the bigger the better, that’s a panto fact.
The choreographers show us how to move:
Step ball change, pirouette or funky groove.
Carrie put in a lot of work
'You can move your hips but please don't twerk!'
The MD also had her work cut out,
'Don't smile, watch me, sing out but don’t shout!'
The musicians add that extra wow,
with loads of talent and rhythmical know-how.
The production secretary keeps us all in check,
but if you mess up HQ, she'll break your neck!
The front of house and bar team look after the crowd,
after interval drinks they can get very loud.
The prompt helps with forgotten lines
and writes 'name of man' on her helpful signs.
The callers make sure we're not late
and those parent helpers are really great.
There are amazing sets and realistic props
and the costume team pull out all the stops.
Eyebrows need to be bold or so I’m told
by the makeup team who paint the Genie gold.
The sound crew makes sure they can hear at the back,
and deals with the sweaty socks that protect our mic packs.
When the baddie appears there's a lot of smoke,
it sometimes makes poor Chelsea choke.
The lighting team makes the carpet fly
and we see them all dance as we sing goodbye.
GAOS brings together folk from far and wide,
with many nationalities working side by side.
It’s sometimes exhausting but lots of fun,
and I thank each and everyone of you for what you have done.
